I used to think boundaries were only possible for other people.
I nodded when my teachers talked about letting go and saying "no", but the truth is, I didn't really believe it was possible for me.
Deep down, I thought I was an exception.
I believed that there were people who needed helping who only I could help, that there were some things that needed to be held that only I could hold.
My heart couldn't bear the thought of letting someone down, or the likelihood that they would suffer because of it (or the possibility that they’d think I was demanding, or worse: selfish).
Of course, I knew my energy was my responsibility.
I tried not to over-commit and over-give, but the landscape of my life didn't feel like my own.
To most people I must have appeared warm, open and loving, which was true, in part.
But inside I was hunkered down in a protective stance, shields up, trying to deflect every possible request for my last dribbles of energy.
I'd ruminate about setting a boundary for months, rehearsing conversations in my mind, finally shoring up my courage, only to do it halfway, or more often, stall out before I even began, ending up heart-heavy, in the same situation as before.
Or, in moments of pure exhaustion and frustration, I'd erupt in a blur of jumbled words and tears, only to collapse in a puddle of shame and grief.
I desperately didn't want to feel resentful, but I did.
Let me ask...
How long have you been over-giving, giving up, and giving in?
How long has your sacred inner terrain--your energy, thoughts and feelings--been tied up in the needs and desires of others?
How often do you feel bad about saying "no" (even when you know your loved ones don't want you to feel this way)?
You just want to be able to...
Tell your partner, "I'm going to the woods for the weekend," without feeling selfish (then guilty, then resentful).
Decline an invitation to a family gathering without spending all night worrying, then all day writing an email, trying to find the perfect words to not rock the boat.
Feel bold and brave enough to create a life that’s yours, without spinning in indecision from taking everyone and everything into consideration.
You’re already doing brave and beautiful work.
You’re making every effort to take care of yourself.
But if you're really being honest...
You know you "should" be setting boundaries, but in your particular circumstances, you don't really think it's possible.
You know it’s not selfish to prioritize your needs, but you still find it hard to just do it.
You want to stop your pattern of over-giving, but in the moment when it gets tricky, you carry on as usual.
And you really don't want to feel resentful, but you sometimes do, even toward the people you love the most.
Here's what I've found.
Caring doesn’t have to feel like carrying.
I know you've always been the peacemaker, the caregiver, the bridge builder.
But even though you adore extending your gifts of love and connection, your life doesn't necessarily have to bear the weight of others' problems and needs.
And even though you’ve always been highly attuned to those around you, this doesn’t mean you need to absorb their energy, thoughts and feelings until you can hardly sense your own.
And while it's true you need protection, that's not all.
Energetic boundaries--mantras, shields, talismans and intentions--are helpful, but can't stand alone.
Real protection grows from power, cultivated from within.
This is the natural strength and clarity of sovereignty, your own deep connection to Self.
And, perhaps most importantly, you don’t need to have it all figured out before you begin.
Waiting to know exactly what you want or waiting to be absolutely sure about your choice or waiting to have the perfect words to set a boundary will have you waiting forever.
You get to begin, explore, discover, make mistakes and change your mind--you are allowed to be human.
It's time to claim the wisdom that's already yours.
Imagine what your life would be like if you could…
Free yourself from obligations and shoulds, cultivating life rhythms that feed you rather than deplete you.
Set boundaries infused with truth, compassion and ease, bringing even deeper connection and freedom to your relationships.
And trust your own intuitive knowing, so you can more easily make decisions and hold yourself through each new challenge and cycle of becoming.
I created a place for you.
I crafted this journey because I am a holder of hearts.
I am a library of stories of deeply feeling souls:
Stories of women trying to hold it all together while longing for a life that holds them instead.
Stories of the endless wrestling, rumination and indecision and that comes from too many obligations and expectations interfering with their innate intuition.
Stories of smart and capable souls thinking they have to muscle their way through a challenging relationship, only to laugh with tears of relief upon recalling the wisdom of their own tender knowing.
All this is to say: You're not alone.
I'm here to walk with you, to take your hand, to join you in this reclamation, this quiet revolution.
It's time to re-inhabit and return.
The Wild Empath
: Reclaiming the terrain of your sensitive soul :
A five-month journey of foundational tools and sacred practices to cultivate a life as tender and wild as you.
This beautiful journey has begun.
The tender hearts have gathered and the Doors are closed.
Want to be in the know the next time we gather 'round?
Hey there, I'm Liv.
My heart is tender and wild like yours.
I used to take on the weight of the world like it was my job.
I used to take care of people until I couldn't recognize my life as my own.
I used to think that I couldn't have the life I wanted because everyone around me was suffering more, and needed more.
Even in healthy loving relationships, I felt demanding if I attempted to claim the smallest thing for myself, and guilty and resentful when I did.
For a long time I believed that because I was so sensitive, I would always feel heavy, untangled and occupied by the energy, problems and needs of others.
But things began to change when I started honoring and harnessing my empathic gifts, and unearthing and developing unique ways to reclaim my energy, set boundaries, make decisions and deepen my intuition.
Now I use these foundational practices and intuitive tools, infused with the support of the Sacred Feminine and Earth wisdom, to help other empaths and sensitives create lives that align with the core of who they are.
This work isn't about creating a perfect life, it's about cultivating resilience, and the ease, compassion and delight that's possible when you reclaim the wisdom already within.